01
Upload the evidence
Drop in the resume you have been defending in group chats.
Your resume is under fire.
The roast you need.
Upload your resume. Get your roast fast: a brutally honest, actually useful AI takedown with specific fixes for the bullet points that need to answer for their crimes.
Free roast + shareable scorecard. No payment required.
Resume Roast
Sample scorecard
Sample result
Good at hiding
its impact.
You say “results-driven” three times, yet the actual results are apparently classified.
Buzzword density82
Actually quantifies impact41
Would survive 6 seconds28
Rehire potential67
Example of a shareable result.
No vague pep talks.
Three steps. Zero coddling.
02
Get the useful takedown
Receive sharp, specific feedback on vague bullets, filler, and missing proof.
03
Share the verdict
Turn the scorecard into a screenshot worth posting—or keep the damage private.
The scorecard
Specific enough to fix.
Every category puts a spotlight on the stuff that makes recruiters skim, sigh, or move on. The joke lands. The action item lands harder.
Impact over adjectives
Find the proof your strongest bullets forgot to include.
Recruiter-readability
See whether your resume earns more than a six-second glance.
The callout
“Led cross-functional initiatives” is not a measurable achievement.
Try: “Coordinated a five-person launch team that cut onboarding time by 32%.” Now we are talking.
6 sec
The average first pass is fast. Your evidence needs to be faster.
Sample post
I survived a resume roast.
Example share copy: “My scorecard says I should replace ‘dynamic self-starter’ with one actual accomplishment. Fair.”
Illustrative only
Built to be shared
A scorecard people want to screenshot.
Get a clean, funny receipt for taking your job search seriously. Share your real result if you want. Keep it private if you do not.
Make my scorecardReady for the receipt?
Put your resume on the stand.
The free Roast gives you a scorecard and practical fixes—without a payment step.
Resume repair desk
Need a little specific help?
Start with the problem your resume has today. These practical guides show the work; the free Roast tells you where yours is still hiding.
Get the free diagnosisWhen you are ready to repair it
Turn the roast into a rewrite.
The free verdict identifies the work. The $49 Rescue Rewrite turns it into a full rewrite with an ATS pass, stronger impact bullets, one tailored cover letter, and up to three job-targeted resume versions.
- Full resume rewrite
- ATS pass + stronger impact bullets
- Tailored cover letter
- Up to 3 job-targeted versions