01
Upload the evidence
Drop in the resume you have been defending in group chats.
Your resume is under fire.
The roast you need.
Upload your resume. Get a brutally honest, actually useful AI takedown. Then share the scorecard that proves your bullet points need to answer for their crimes.
Free roast + shareable scorecard. No payment required.
Resume Roast
Scorecard
Your resume is
Good at hiding
its impact.
You say “results-driven” three times, yet the actual results are apparently classified.
Buzzword density82
Actually quantifies impact41
Would survive 6 seconds28
Rehire potential67
Funny enough to share.
No vague pep talks.
Three steps. Zero coddling.
02
Get the useful takedown
Receive sharp, specific feedback on vague bullets, filler, and missing proof.
03
Share the verdict
Turn the scorecard into a screenshot worth posting—or keep the damage private.
The scorecard
Specific enough to fix.
Every category puts a spotlight on the stuff that makes recruiters skim, sigh, or move on. The joke lands. The action item lands harder.
Impact over adjectives
Find the proof your strongest bullets forgot to include.
Recruiter-readability
See whether your resume earns more than a six-second glance.
The callout
“Led cross-functional initiatives” is not a measurable achievement.
Try: “Coordinated a five-person launch team that cut onboarding time by 32%.” Now we are talking.
6 sec
The average first pass is fast. Your evidence needs to be faster.
Shareable
I survived a resume roast.
My scorecard says I should replace “dynamic self-starter” with one actual accomplishment. Fair.
Resume Roast
Built to be posted
A scorecard people want to screenshot.
The roast is free because the scorecard is the proof: a clean, funny receipt for taking your job search seriously. Share it if you want. Keep it private if you do not.
Make my scorecardWhen you are ready to repair it
Turn the roast into a rewrite.
The free verdict identifies the work. The Rescue Rewrite turns it into a full rewrite, ATS-focused polish, and a tailored cover letter.
- Full resume rewrite
- ATS-optimization pass
- Tailored cover-letter support